@batboy: they're still there, all of them are linked from the Wiki (some of the links have changed since they were posted here but it's easier to update the links on the Wiki since they're all together). If you want to see the original short scenes, those are collected in this section. If you prefer the longer 10-minute blocks, those are collected in this section.
oh i didnt notice that you completely renamed them too lol... i had put the old blocks on a playlist so i could watch them all at once and when i was going to get a friend hooked on it tonight it was saying that the video had been removed. so that is good news that i just need to remake the play list lol.
@Dr-Timelord: this was another fun scene for me to do because I was fully in character for both halves of the conversation, and I really got to play off the differences in the two personalities here, much more so than in Scene 44. On the one hand, you've got Reyf being cool and rational, while Garr's mood seems to gyrate back and forth between calm and dangerously unstable, sometimes even in the same line. This is only the first half of the confrontation, but some important things were set up here for the next scene, 44B, which will take place on the bridge. And of course, the set is dark, so when Garr gets angry, his eyes glow again.
Some things to notice about this scene:
1. Garr's guard seems to drop a little when he attempts to convince Reyf to join him. When Reyf refuses, he seems either confused or surprised.
2. All through the movie, we've heard Reyf talk about overcoming challenges, and more recently about confronting difficult emotions, and now about confronting pain--all sentiments which we now know came from Garr, after Wolf 359.
3. Now, we've heard Garr admit that he couldn't face his own pain and grief after Kristie left him, despite everything he'd told Reyf a few years prior.
4. Think back to Scene 34, "The Visitation," as well as the Wolf 359 flashback, while watching this scene.
@Dr-Timelord: this was another fun scene for me to do because I was fully in character for both halves of the conversation, and I really got to play off the differences in the two personalities here, much more so than in Scene 44. On the one hand, you've got Reyf being cool and rational, while Garr's mood seems to gyrate back and forth between calm and dangerously unstable, sometimes even in the same line. This is only the first half of the confrontation, but some important things were set up here for the next scene, 44B, which will take place on the bridge. And of course, the set is dark, so when Garr gets angry, his eyes glow again.
Some things to notice about this scene:
1. Garr's guard seems to drop a little when he attempts to convince Reyf to join him. When Reyf refuses, he seems either confused or surprised.
2. All through the movie, we've heard Reyf talk about overcoming challenges, and more recently about confronting difficult emotions, and now about confronting pain--all sentiments which we now know came from Garr, after Wolf 359.
3. Now, we've heard Garr admit that he couldn't face his own pain and grief after Kristie left him, despite everything he'd told Reyf a few years prior.
4. Think back to Scene 34, "The Visitation," as well as the Wolf 359 flashback, while watching this scene.
I know why his eyes glow -
1. a side effect of the radiation particles hes been using to experiment with time travel, or
2. He built another android, this one so that he wouldnt be able to tell the difference himself, as well - except this android was OF himself, and led Reyf on a wild goose-chase. or
2a. Same as above, except he already went back in time/died. The android, thinking that he is Garr, attempts to go back in time to do what he already did. or
3. Occular implants to give himself better vision
or, as mentioned above
4. Garr= Grand Admiral Thrawn (mitt'hraw'nuerodo)
@homerpalooza: read this only if you really want to know
Good guesses all, but no #3 and #1 are kind of right. The answer is in Scene 19C and 30A and will be discussed in dialogue later; basically, something went horribly wrong during one of his first time travel experiments, and he suffered severe radiation poisoning as a result. This caused the damage the EMH reported in scene 19C, which was later revealed to be the same as what was caused by the unstable singularity that the Fairgrieve fell into, which we learned about in Scene 30A. It was bad enough, however, that Garr had to essentially replace portions of his organic physiology with synthetic prostheses based on Borg technology (Borg weapons, Borg warp drive, Borg shields, now this).
We'll be hearing about this later on. After Reyf convinces Dr. Garr to stand down, they both transport back to the Fitzgerald. A short time later, when Reyf reports to the EMH for an overdue followup, she tells him about what she's found during an analysis of the transporter records, specifically that Garr "isn't entirely human."
Actually, I was hoping the First Officer would stop being such a pussy. I was hoping before Reyf beamed over, that he'd (just one time) hit Reyf HARD enough with a backhand bitchslap that Reyf's great grandchildren would feel it. Could you imagine Riker or Lt. Reed quietly allowing Picard or Archer to beam over alone?
"Are you insane? I'm sending over a protective detail. End of story, end of conversation. You've got two choices: One - Relieved of duty and the brig until a psychiatric evaluation can be performed and Starfleet Command advises me on my next move; or, Two - the protective detail. Your move, Reyf."
Actually, I was hoping the First Officer would stop being such a pussy. I was hoping before Reyf beamed over, that he'd (just one time) hit Reyf HARD enough with a backhand bitchslap that Reyf's great grandchildren would feel it. Could you imagine Riker or Lt. Reed quietly allowing Picard or Archer to beam over alone?
"Are you insane? I'm sending over a protective detail. End of story, end of conversation. You've got two choices: One - Relieved of duty and the brig until a psychiatric evaluation can be performed and Starfleet Command advises me on my next move; or, Two - the protective detail. Your move, Reyf."
Not. Happening. PERIOD.
Thats not the way it works in any military, fictional or real. In order to relieve the captain of command, the XO would at the very least need the support of the second officer (kendra, probably) if not the entire senior staff; must fully log that he was doing so to protect the captain and the ship, and must be able to hold it up to a starfleet inquiry.
Considering that the success of the mission depended on the captain, going alone to face his friend and former mentor, and that sending a protective detail - or just going with a phaser - would have destroyed the slim (but predetermined) hope that he would be able to talk Garr out of his attempted time travel (why did it have to be so exotic anyway? By this time, there were quite a few tried-and-true methods for time travel [too many, but thats a different story]), it was quite necessary for him to go alone. And considering that the XO was fully capable of assuming command in case the worst happened, and that Rayf being absent for a lengthly period of time would require that his command codes be voided and computer access locked out until reinstated, theres no reason for him to above and beyond the first officers job to protect the captain.
...his attempted time travel (why did it have to be so exotic anyway? By this time, there were quite a few tried-and-true methods for time travel...
I just want to say that this was an Incredibly Lame Pun :-p The answer to that question was addressed in the opening moments of Scene 39A, "Stellar Cartography:"
RONSTON: There's one thing I don't understand. If all of this has been about Garr gearing up to go back in time, there have got to be simpler ways to do this than introducing a whole new paradigm. The clever fiendishness of this sinister plot just seems like too much for what he's doing.
REYF: On the face of it, it would seem to be his ego at work. But my hunch is that all the known methods of time travel are too imprecise for Garr's liking. He'd seek to eliminate the element of chance from his plans, to avoid even the possibility of failure.
Alright, if you insist The answer may surprise you.
If you've watched the original trailer for the movie, you'll remember a scene in the observation lounge between Reyf and Prentice, in which Prentice demands to know why Reyf is so afraid of Garr, and Reyf responds that Garr will rip the space-time continuum apart if he isn't stopped. That was originally part of a planned larger B-story involving Reyf's emotional state (some parts of that plotline still remain, Reyf's chat with Troi and Prentice's chat with Erickson). The specific scene in the lounge was the original Scene 41, taking place just before the ship arrived at Sector 585 (and it was here that we got the bit about the choice Reyf made not to go to Intelligence). It was then that Prentice threatened to relieve Reyf of duty, before Reyf revealed exactly how dangerous Garr might be, and the comm call came in. That was after a planned chat between Prentice and Erickson in her quarters, where they both acknowledged he was emotionally compromised, and debated whether he was still fit for duty. That's why in Scene 32 Prentice is on the bridge instead of Reyf, it was important to show before that point that he was very much able to take command himself.
As is, Prentice's character has been set up to be conscious of the dangers Reyf faces, but that gets balanced with personal loyalty (and if you notice, he almost goes too far in both directions at different places throughout the film, only achieving balance at Reyf's moment of truth--far too late to do any good, though). We haven't seen the last of that Aborted Arc though.
Scene 46B, which takes place after Reyf transports back to the Fitzgerald and Garr speaks to Admiral Thornton, involves Prentice, Erickson, and Reyf in their roles as McCoy, Kirk, and Spock, respectively, as they reflect on their experience.
By the way gang, I just finished polishing up the script for Scene 45B, and I'm going to start production on it tomorrow. This is going to be a tricky scene, taking place as it does on the Voyager bridge (the background plates are going to take an eternity to render), but I can promise you that if you liked Scene 45A, this one will be well worth the wait. Big surprise, but Garr wasn't being entirely truthful about his motives in the earlier scene; that was all about getting Reyf to join him, but if you caught his stunned reaction there at the end and his quick exit, you know there's more going on than we've been told. In 45B we finally, at long last, get to the very heart of the matter.
Just checking in, Scene 45B is coming along VERY nicely, I'm about 60% done with it, and this is shaping up to be an extremely emotional scene. I can't wait to get it up for you guys to see.
This scene features Garr's best line of the entire movie, words that frankly I've always wanted to say, ever since Captain Picard said them in First Contact: "Get off my bridge!"
Alright, gang, it's not perfect yet (backgrounds still need work in places), but Scene 45B, "Repentance," is up! View and comment please: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=q-UY88AkKq0
A necessary evil, but with a sophisticated hero and a villain to match, it was the only way this would really work. Using "Quest for Vengeance" kind of forced me to frame the dialogue accordingly.
problem - that bit when garr faces down rayf, you cant hear what hes saying. and then hes holding a combadge - what does that have to do with anything? theyre both wearing their badges! (unless thats an easter egg?)
@homer: I think that's mostly just an audio glitch, we're meant to hear what he says there even though he's whispering; what happens then is that Garr is telling Reyf he's going to get his second chance to be happy, no matter what. Reyf points out, by means of trying to defuse the situation, that his combadge fell off, but not all the shots reflect that yet as I haven't actually decided where to have it fall off.
The implication is that at that moment, everything that Reyf has been saying is sinking in, and he's remembering the good times and why they both joined Starfleet to begin with--because they both felt that it stood for something good, and Garr realizing that exactly as Reyf said, he's lost touch with those good memories. When his fingers curl around it it's a visual cue that he's coming to his senses.
I didn't realize the audio was so low he couldn't be heard clearly, I'll have to up the volume on that snippet. I actually lowered the sound of the ambient bridge noises so we could hear the music more clearly after Garr screams, I thought that would preclude any other sound problems. Ah well, that's easy to fix!
And now we know the whole story of how Garr became the villainous mastermind that he is, and we know what everything has been building towards. But haven't quite run out of story just yet, there's still a few more surprises to be unleashed.
And it all starts with Scene 46A, "Redemption," coming soon!
And now that you know the whole story, I have to ask what you think of these two character arcs?
Reyf: started out young and fairly inexperienced, trying to teach a lesson to Erickson at the start that he didn't even realize he still needed to learn. He tried to tell her about the importance of facing the unknown, and meeting life's challenges, when come to find out the mission was bringing him face to face with an unknown that he--until the very end--wasn't ready to meet. Conquering those feelings is what ultimately gave him the strength of will he needed to face Garr and force his old friend to see the truth.
Garr: then there's the evil scientist, who forced Reyf to come to terms with his father's death then they were younger, then push through his doubts and grief to join Starfleet, only to become angry at Reyf's refusal to go to Starfleet Intelligence with him, and turned his back on his old friend. Then, after the two became separated, he became involved with someone who forced him to change to be with her, then abandoned him for bigger and better things, leaving Garr an emotional wreck. It's obvious he holds Reyf responsible for not being there when it happened, which is why he put the idea in his head that going off on the Antilles was a mistake, so he could convince him to join him on his time travel journey (if you didn't know that was really Garr in Scene 34, now you do!). Then, when he meets up with Reyf, it turns out the captain has realized that Garr was still wallowing in the very feelings he himself had experienced after Wolf 359, only he hasn't dealt with it nearly as well.
So it's full circle for both of them. I like to think that we've seen Reyf do some growing up, and I'd also like to think we can now see Garr not just as an evil mastermind, but as someone responding in a 24th century way to some very understandable human emotions (admittedly a Space Whale Aesop).
I'm interested to hear what you guys think. Scene 46A is some procedural stuff about Garr owning up to what he's done; then there's a chat in Reyf's ready room with the Power Trio. Then Reyf reports to sickbay to ask the EMH to look over the transporter logs (remember scene 19C, "EMH Reports"), while the Kristie android visits Garr's guest quarters.
After that, the real fun begins. See, anyone can make a choice, as Reyf did. The question is, how many can then stick with that choice, regardless of the consequences?
A necessary evil, but with a sophisticated hero and a villain to match, it was the only way this would really work. Using "Quest for Vengeance" kind of forced me to frame the dialogue accordingly.
I can understand wanting to frame your dialogue around your background music, but unfortunately, for me, it just feels like a carbon copy of the scene from the movie.
There is nothing wrong with the back and fourth itself, its quite good but possibly should change the scene around a little? I didn't really click until you mentioned 'Frankenstein' and played it out the same way as in ST FC
I'm not sure if you're in a hurry now to finish it all since you're so close to the end, but i can understand being 'inspired' by the same scene from the movie, it is a good character moment for Picard and his realisation at what he is becoming
I knew at Some point there would be a confrontation between hero and villain and i understand his motivations for wanting to make changes to his life, redemption etc but to come this close to his final goal and have a change of heart....Nah.
If anything i thought Garr would have similar character drives and motives to Tolian Soran.
Soran had a happy life until he lost his wife and family to the borg, and with the nexus he knew he had a chance to go back to a point where he was happy and live there and would do anything to return to that point in his life.
Kinda thought Garr has that same drive as well, especially after planning it for so many years
@Dr-Timelord: as I said, we haven't quite run out of story to tell just yet! Don't give up on me now, I am in a bit of a hurry but not quite for the reason you think (I'm eager to get to Scene 49). We have a few minor (but necessary) procedural scenes to get through before...something major happens. All I can say is, if you felt that Scene 45B is a tad anticlimactic, then you're right
Stay tuned :cool:
If you want to know (and ONLY if you want to know, and I mean REALLY want to know):
Scene 46 "Redemption" - Garr owns up to his actions with Admiral Thornton. This is all and only about proving he's wanting to do the right thing.
Scene 47 - The Power Trio discuss what to do next, Prentice continuing to express disbelief at Reyf's insistence on helping Garr, while Erickson thinks he's beyond help.
Scene 48A "Specter of the Past" - the Kristie android visit's Garr's guest quarters
Scene 48B - Reyf and Erickson return to the bridge, and have a quick discussion about heroes and villains
Scene 48C - Reyf reports to sickbay to enlist the help of the EMH to analyze the transporter logs from when they beamed Garr over; a followup to Scene 19C. We learn something startling about Garr's physiology, just before he gets a call from the bridge: "Voyager just took off."
Scene 49 "The Starship Chase" - the Fitzgerald takes off in hot pursuit of the ISS Voyager. Turns out something the Kristie android said made Garr change his mind and decide that he was doing the right thing the whole time, but for the wrong reasons. Garr was able to return to his ship thanks to a Borg transporter node he built into the Kristie android, which beamed them both off the Fitzgerald. At the end of this scene, we realize that it really was the Arctic Circle all over again: he was going to carry out his plan or die trying, as Reyf is forced to destroy the ISS Voyager (actually all we know is that it disappears into a blinding flash which overloads the Fitzgerald sensors--when we get readings back, there's no trace of Garr or his ship, so what really happened is anyone's guess).
Scene 50A - Data and Reyf talk about humanity, and what the takeaway is from this mission.
Scene 50B - The "tying up loose ends" montage. Dr. Falwell returns to the ship, Ronston and Erickson get together, and Data and Troi return to the Enterprise.
Scene 51 - The epilogue, Reyf talks to Chellik and we find out that Garrett is back at his post, but according to Prentice could never find out what happened to the real Kristie, and comments "we may never know who she really was." They return to the bridge, and set a new course for the unexplored mass of the universe. Reyf barely misses the exit of a crewman wearing a blue uniform and gold-rimmed glasses from the aft science station.
Scene 52 - End Credits
Scene 52A - Coda
I think its a very good trek story. I still believe that while the whole thing played out pretty well, even though the idea of a broken heart+mad scientist feels a bit lame to me. I would love to see an "alternate" ending with Garr screaming "noooo" and then activating the time machine thingamjigg (and incidentally blowing up the Fitz).
I still think that overall, the movie is very good, but it still can use tightening in places.
* TV vs. Movie format: You can break it up into a mini series of 3 or even 4 episodes, in which case i would suggest you trim out roughly a third to half of the "scene transition beauty shots of the fitzgerald". If you choose to release it as a single feature-length fan-film, i would strongly recommend that you trim about 2 thirds of those in order to increase the pacing and drama a drop - all Star Trek movies are noticeably low on "external beauty shots" for the simple reason that movies do not have commercial breaks, and those were designed to give audiences a few moments to get ready for the show to resume after commercials. (obviously, where necessary you should use them.
*Animating: Brandon, you have done a hell of a job - the movie is so far 4 out 5 stars in my book - but a lot of the earlier scenes need some minor to
major work to bring them up to the level of the end of the movie. i would suggest wait until you do initial dialog with your cast, you may decide to trim some scenes and make others longer.
*Licensing: Your work is top notch. Try getting in touch with CBS and see if you could work some sort of licensing for your movie. Its awesome and deserves some sort of "official" nod, even if you cant make money from it.
/EDIT: Brandon, i need to ask you a serious favor - it will mean a lot to me and many other trek fans if you do this - i understand if it will take too much time, but im begging:
Please redo a portion of the scene; Rayf is begging Garr to reconsider and man up and all that, and Garr responds: "SHUT UP WESLEY!"
@homerpalooza: the length as of this scene is 2 hours 41 minutes. I've already got my eye on a few pieces of scenes that need to be cut (one example, Reyf's "Unbelievable" at the end of Scene 19C). I'm starting to agree with you on the exterior shots, but more on that in a minute.
1. Haven't quite decided which way to go with this. Two hours and a half is the longest I want this thing to be, because that's the maximum the Windows 7 DVD burning app can fit on a single disc.
2. I agree, this whole thing has been a learning process in many ways. I look back at the earliest scenes and you're right, there's no comparison.
3. You'll get no argument from me! If "Star Wreck" could get the green light for release, I'm sure mine could too!
As far as the exteriors go, that's part of the plan. Here's what I'm going to do:
I'm going to make my director's cut (dialogue trims and all), and post that 15-minute-block style for all to see. From there, I'm going to leave it up to the fans (basically the good crew here at SFM) to help me decide where exteriors are justified and where they're just fluff. Based on that feedback, I'll take out the ones that everyone can agree are superfluous (and, where necessary, can recommend replacement material I can live with), shuffle them so that my favorite exterior shots are left in, and we'll see what we can agree on. Whatever comes out of that effort will basically be the "final cut."
As far as what Reyf's ultimate test is...its name is Gaius Reyf
Oh no, nothing like that. Although when she returns to the ship, she crosses her arms and looks at him, and he just kind of sheepishly nods. An unspoken "I told you so" from her, and a tacit acknowledgment by him No, his test is much much more involved than that. Remember what he said at the beginning of the movie: "Each of us, at some point in our lives, will face a challenge that will force us to confront the very essence of who we are." Amazingly he hasn't faced that yet--but he will! (Let me put it to you this way--the movie has not had its climax yet, that takes place at the end of Scene 49)
As for that little blooper of yours, well...we'll see
Garr didnt really surrender, did he? The whole giving in to Rayf was just a ploy? Or now that the ISS Voyager is in Rayf's hands, he has to resist going back in time to save his dad?
BTW, when i mentioned justifying defending Garr, i meant defending him at the court martial, not to Falwell
Posts
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Iv4JUpRdIFo
Now you know why it was so critical that Garr be responsible for Reyf's entry into Starfleet Academy and, ultimately, into Starfleet itself.
1. Garr's guard seems to drop a little when he attempts to convince Reyf to join him. When Reyf refuses, he seems either confused or surprised.
2. All through the movie, we've heard Reyf talk about overcoming challenges, and more recently about confronting difficult emotions, and now about confronting pain--all sentiments which we now know came from Garr, after Wolf 359.
3. Now, we've heard Garr admit that he couldn't face his own pain and grief after Kristie left him, despite everything he'd told Reyf a few years prior.
4. Think back to Scene 34, "The Visitation," as well as the Wolf 359 flashback, while watching this scene.
2. He built another android, this one so that he wouldnt be able to tell the difference himself, as well - except this android was OF himself, and led Reyf on a wild goose-chase. or
2a. Same as above, except he already went back in time/died. The android, thinking that he is Garr, attempts to go back in time to do what he already did. or
3. Occular implants to give himself better vision
or, as mentioned above
4. Garr= Grand Admiral Thrawn (mitt'hraw'nuerodo)
We'll be hearing about this later on. After Reyf convinces Dr. Garr to stand down, they both transport back to the Fitzgerald. A short time later, when Reyf reports to the EMH for an overdue followup, she tells him about what she's found during an analysis of the transporter records, specifically that Garr "isn't entirely human."
Can't have star trek with out some fist fighting lol
"Are you insane? I'm sending over a protective detail. End of story, end of conversation. You've got two choices: One - Relieved of duty and the brig until a psychiatric evaluation can be performed and Starfleet Command advises me on my next move; or, Two - the protective detail. Your move, Reyf."
Not. Happening. PERIOD.
Thats not the way it works in any military, fictional or real. In order to relieve the captain of command, the XO would at the very least need the support of the second officer (kendra, probably) if not the entire senior staff; must fully log that he was doing so to protect the captain and the ship, and must be able to hold it up to a starfleet inquiry.
Considering that the success of the mission depended on the captain, going alone to face his friend and former mentor, and that sending a protective detail - or just going with a phaser - would have destroyed the slim (but predetermined) hope that he would be able to talk Garr out of his attempted time travel (why did it have to be so exotic anyway? By this time, there were quite a few tried-and-true methods for time travel [too many, but thats a different story]), it was quite necessary for him to go alone. And considering that the XO was fully capable of assuming command in case the worst happened, and that Rayf being absent for a lengthly period of time would require that his command codes be voided and computer access locked out until reinstated, theres no reason for him to above and beyond the first officers job to protect the captain.
I just want to say that this was an Incredibly Lame Pun :-p The answer to that question was addressed in the opening moments of Scene 39A, "Stellar Cartography:"
RONSTON: There's one thing I don't understand. If all of this has been about Garr gearing up to go back in time, there have got to be simpler ways to do this than introducing a whole new paradigm. The clever fiendishness of this sinister plot just seems like too much for what he's doing.
REYF: On the face of it, it would seem to be his ego at work. But my hunch is that all the known methods of time travel are too imprecise for Garr's liking. He'd seek to eliminate the element of chance from his plans, to avoid even the possibility of failure.
and i would appreciate feedback on my remarks to hellsgate....even the best defense is not free
If you've watched the original trailer for the movie, you'll remember a scene in the observation lounge between Reyf and Prentice, in which Prentice demands to know why Reyf is so afraid of Garr, and Reyf responds that Garr will rip the space-time continuum apart if he isn't stopped. That was originally part of a planned larger B-story involving Reyf's emotional state (some parts of that plotline still remain, Reyf's chat with Troi and Prentice's chat with Erickson). The specific scene in the lounge was the original Scene 41, taking place just before the ship arrived at Sector 585 (and it was here that we got the bit about the choice Reyf made not to go to Intelligence). It was then that Prentice threatened to relieve Reyf of duty, before Reyf revealed exactly how dangerous Garr might be, and the comm call came in. That was after a planned chat between Prentice and Erickson in her quarters, where they both acknowledged he was emotionally compromised, and debated whether he was still fit for duty. That's why in Scene 32 Prentice is on the bridge instead of Reyf, it was important to show before that point that he was very much able to take command himself.
As is, Prentice's character has been set up to be conscious of the dangers Reyf faces, but that gets balanced with personal loyalty (and if you notice, he almost goes too far in both directions at different places throughout the film, only achieving balance at Reyf's moment of truth--far too late to do any good, though). We haven't seen the last of that Aborted Arc though.
Stay tuned!
This scene features Garr's best line of the entire movie, words that frankly I've always wanted to say, ever since Captain Picard said them in First Contact: "Get off my bridge!"
The implication is that at that moment, everything that Reyf has been saying is sinking in, and he's remembering the good times and why they both joined Starfleet to begin with--because they both felt that it stood for something good, and Garr realizing that exactly as Reyf said, he's lost touch with those good memories. When his fingers curl around it it's a visual cue that he's coming to his senses.
I didn't realize the audio was so low he couldn't be heard clearly, I'll have to up the volume on that snippet. I actually lowered the sound of the ambient bridge noises so we could hear the music more clearly after Garr screams, I thought that would preclude any other sound problems. Ah well, that's easy to fix!
And now we know the whole story of how Garr became the villainous mastermind that he is, and we know what everything has been building towards. But haven't quite run out of story just yet, there's still a few more surprises to be unleashed.
And it all starts with Scene 46A, "Redemption," coming soon!
Reyf: started out young and fairly inexperienced, trying to teach a lesson to Erickson at the start that he didn't even realize he still needed to learn. He tried to tell her about the importance of facing the unknown, and meeting life's challenges, when come to find out the mission was bringing him face to face with an unknown that he--until the very end--wasn't ready to meet. Conquering those feelings is what ultimately gave him the strength of will he needed to face Garr and force his old friend to see the truth.
Garr: then there's the evil scientist, who forced Reyf to come to terms with his father's death then they were younger, then push through his doubts and grief to join Starfleet, only to become angry at Reyf's refusal to go to Starfleet Intelligence with him, and turned his back on his old friend. Then, after the two became separated, he became involved with someone who forced him to change to be with her, then abandoned him for bigger and better things, leaving Garr an emotional wreck. It's obvious he holds Reyf responsible for not being there when it happened, which is why he put the idea in his head that going off on the Antilles was a mistake, so he could convince him to join him on his time travel journey (if you didn't know that was really Garr in Scene 34, now you do!). Then, when he meets up with Reyf, it turns out the captain has realized that Garr was still wallowing in the very feelings he himself had experienced after Wolf 359, only he hasn't dealt with it nearly as well.
So it's full circle for both of them. I like to think that we've seen Reyf do some growing up, and I'd also like to think we can now see Garr not just as an evil mastermind, but as someone responding in a 24th century way to some very understandable human emotions (admittedly a Space Whale Aesop).
I'm interested to hear what you guys think. Scene 46A is some procedural stuff about Garr owning up to what he's done; then there's a chat in Reyf's ready room with the Power Trio. Then Reyf reports to sickbay to ask the EMH to look over the transporter logs (remember scene 19C, "EMH Reports"), while the Kristie android visits Garr's guest quarters.
After that, the real fun begins. See, anyone can make a choice, as Reyf did. The question is, how many can then stick with that choice, regardless of the consequences?
I can understand wanting to frame your dialogue around your background music, but unfortunately, for me, it just feels like a carbon copy of the scene from the movie.
There is nothing wrong with the back and fourth itself, its quite good but possibly should change the scene around a little? I didn't really click until you mentioned 'Frankenstein' and played it out the same way as in ST FC
I'm not sure if you're in a hurry now to finish it all since you're so close to the end, but i can understand being 'inspired' by the same scene from the movie, it is a good character moment for Picard and his realisation at what he is becoming
I knew at Some point there would be a confrontation between hero and villain and i understand his motivations for wanting to make changes to his life, redemption etc but to come this close to his final goal and have a change of heart....Nah.
If anything i thought Garr would have similar character drives and motives to Tolian Soran.
Soran had a happy life until he lost his wife and family to the borg, and with the nexus he knew he had a chance to go back to a point where he was happy and live there and would do anything to return to that point in his life.
Kinda thought Garr has that same drive as well, especially after planning it for so many years
Stay tuned :cool:
If you want to know (and ONLY if you want to know, and I mean REALLY want to know):
Scene 47 - The Power Trio discuss what to do next, Prentice continuing to express disbelief at Reyf's insistence on helping Garr, while Erickson thinks he's beyond help.
Scene 48A "Specter of the Past" - the Kristie android visit's Garr's guest quarters
Scene 48B - Reyf and Erickson return to the bridge, and have a quick discussion about heroes and villains
Scene 48C - Reyf reports to sickbay to enlist the help of the EMH to analyze the transporter logs from when they beamed Garr over; a followup to Scene 19C. We learn something startling about Garr's physiology, just before he gets a call from the bridge: "Voyager just took off."
Scene 49 "The Starship Chase" - the Fitzgerald takes off in hot pursuit of the ISS Voyager. Turns out something the Kristie android said made Garr change his mind and decide that he was doing the right thing the whole time, but for the wrong reasons. Garr was able to return to his ship thanks to a Borg transporter node he built into the Kristie android, which beamed them both off the Fitzgerald. At the end of this scene, we realize that it really was the Arctic Circle all over again: he was going to carry out his plan or die trying, as Reyf is forced to destroy the ISS Voyager (actually all we know is that it disappears into a blinding flash which overloads the Fitzgerald sensors--when we get readings back, there's no trace of Garr or his ship, so what really happened is anyone's guess).
Scene 50A - Data and Reyf talk about humanity, and what the takeaway is from this mission.
Scene 50B - The "tying up loose ends" montage. Dr. Falwell returns to the ship, Ronston and Erickson get together, and Data and Troi return to the Enterprise.
Scene 51 - The epilogue, Reyf talks to Chellik and we find out that Garrett is back at his post, but according to Prentice could never find out what happened to the real Kristie, and comments "we may never know who she really was." They return to the bridge, and set a new course for the unexplored mass of the universe. Reyf barely misses the exit of a crewman wearing a blue uniform and gold-rimmed glasses from the aft science station.
Scene 52 - End Credits
Scene 52A - Coda
I think its a very good trek story. I still believe that while the whole thing played out pretty well, even though the idea of a broken heart+mad scientist feels a bit lame to me. I would love to see an "alternate" ending with Garr screaming "noooo" and then activating the time machine thingamjigg (and incidentally blowing up the Fitz).
I still think that overall, the movie is very good, but it still can use tightening in places.
* TV vs. Movie format: You can break it up into a mini series of 3 or even 4 episodes, in which case i would suggest you trim out roughly a third to half of the "scene transition beauty shots of the fitzgerald". If you choose to release it as a single feature-length fan-film, i would strongly recommend that you trim about 2 thirds of those in order to increase the pacing and drama a drop - all Star Trek movies are noticeably low on "external beauty shots" for the simple reason that movies do not have commercial breaks, and those were designed to give audiences a few moments to get ready for the show to resume after commercials. (obviously, where necessary you should use them.
*Animating: Brandon, you have done a hell of a job - the movie is so far 4 out 5 stars in my book - but a lot of the earlier scenes need some minor to
major work to bring them up to the level of the end of the movie. i would suggest wait until you do initial dialog with your cast, you may decide to trim some scenes and make others longer.
*Licensing: Your work is top notch. Try getting in touch with CBS and see if you could work some sort of licensing for your movie. Its awesome and deserves some sort of "official" nod, even if you cant make money from it.
/EDIT: Brandon, i need to ask you a serious favor - it will mean a lot to me and many other trek fans if you do this - i understand if it will take too much time, but im begging:
1. Haven't quite decided which way to go with this. Two hours and a half is the longest I want this thing to be, because that's the maximum the Windows 7 DVD burning app can fit on a single disc.
2. I agree, this whole thing has been a learning process in many ways. I look back at the earliest scenes and you're right, there's no comparison.
3. You'll get no argument from me! If "Star Wreck" could get the green light for release, I'm sure mine could too!
As far as the exteriors go, that's part of the plan. Here's what I'm going to do:
I'm going to make my director's cut (dialogue trims and all), and post that 15-minute-block style for all to see. From there, I'm going to leave it up to the fans (basically the good crew here at SFM) to help me decide where exteriors are justified and where they're just fluff. Based on that feedback, I'll take out the ones that everyone can agree are superfluous (and, where necessary, can recommend replacement material I can live with), shuffle them so that my favorite exterior shots are left in, and we'll see what we can agree on. Whatever comes out of that effort will basically be the "final cut."
As far as what Reyf's ultimate test is...its name is Gaius Reyf
EDIT:
As for that little blooper of yours, well...we'll see
BTW, when i mentioned justifying defending Garr, i meant defending him at the court martial, not to Falwell